Wednesday, October 28th, 2009

How do appropriately thank a college prof. in this situation?

Here’s the situation- I’m a music major in college and over this semester I’ve run into some issues…I did major damage to my vocal cords and it has required Months of Dr. visits, surgeries, and has made me very sick (because the hefty doses of medications often leave me in a drugged state or make me violently vomit) over the semester. This Prof has been at my side through the entire time. She’s sent me work to do at home, she hasn’t counted an absence against me, she’s gone as far as working with me on the side for hours on end to catch me up. She’s literally taken care of me when I was sick (when she wasn’t teaching), been the source of strength and encouragement to not give up, get well and still be a musician. She’s been the non judgemental ear to listen to all my fears and concerns. Basically, she’s turned into a parent figure to me. Amazing though she’s only 26 with a doctorate in music composition. The situation is a little different than the other profs because we are so close in age. The end of the semester is nearing and I need to figure out how I’m going to thank her for everything she’s done for me. I know I will not have her next year, because they are dropping her to lower level courses I have already completed.

Just some extra info: I come from a very rich family, but the distance from school to my house is big (so my parents/family members have not been around to take care of me during the illness times, but yes they do exist). I’ve tried to give my teacher random 20’s and 50’s here and there for all of her extra time, effort and just going out of her way to see me ok….She always refuses it and laughs it off….I know she’s not in a relationship, nor she she have a baby or family to go home to so I think this is where she’s getting the extra time from… I need to do something for her I just don’t have a clue what.

Oh and I’ll be 19 Friday just so you know the age gap.

Suggestions please!

Do I just write a very personalized thank you letter? I’m so stumped.
And for anyone wondering, she’s not gay and neither am I…so just don’t say it

The thank you letter is a good idea. A small, inexpensive music related gift, once your class is finished, would be a nice gesture as well.

3 Responses to “How do appropriately thank a college prof. in this situation?”

MisS bWooD Says:

i think you should get her a gift certificate for a day at the spa ( you could say something like she spends so much time helping others she should spend some time on herself.. something along those lines) along with a personalized letter thanking and appreciating her help..

and about the age gap thing.. maybe she’s just an devoted and dedicated professor who loves what she does so you should just keep the relationship professional…

anyway, good luck.
=)
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life.

Hammy Says:

The thank you letter is a good idea. A small, inexpensive music related gift, once your class is finished, would be a nice gesture as well.
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Tracy M Says:

Yes! Write her a heartfelt thank you letter on nice stationery or a pretty card. No gushing or fussing — Just tell her how much her efforts mean to you, and how much you look forward to continuing your studies with a strong, healed voice. That will make her happy.

I know you mean well in trying to give her money, but that’s not really appropriate, and it could even be insulting. Cash is only appropriate in certain situations, like someone is driving you all over town for appointments, so you can offer to pay for the gas. A gift, like CD of her favorite composer’s hard-to-find works or some flowers, wouldn’t be so bad. If you do buy something, keep it simple(!) and say that the gift is a small token of your appreciation. And forget that you’re rich. None of that matters. This is just about people being good to people.

Hope you’re feeling better! Good luck with the rest of the semester.
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